06.14.08
NO MONKEY THAT IS NOT CANDY IT IS HOT LAVA
I spent ten hours yesterday either being yelled at or condescended to. By the end of first shift/start of second I was beyond trying to be a fiesty Latina.
DINERS: Hi, table for four?
ME: (grumbly) Four?
DINERS: Yes please.
ME: (immediately starts walking)
DINERS: Oh, are we supposed to-oh wait, hold on!
ME: (throwing menus on table) TABLE FOR FOUR.
DINERS:(running to catch up) Thanks!
ME: (already on my way back to hostess stand) Yup.
WAITER: Anne Marie, what's the matter? You look like somebody just kicked your puppy.
ME: OH DID THEY?
WAITER: No..I...just kidding?
ME: TABLE FOR FOUR? TABLE FOR FOUR? TABLE FOR FUCKING FOUR JESUS CHRIST OR SHALL I SAY HAY-ZEUS CHRISTO, FUCK YOUR MOTHER.
ratherbored at 11:17